6:15 am PST June 22nd 2013, San Jose. "What is that sound? Where is it coming from? Its coming from the the mobile phone. Where is the phone now? Why is it not besides me in the bed? Why is it kept on the drawer besides the window where my hand cannot reach? How many seconds are left before it goes quiet again. Finally...., God you exist". The alarm in my mobile phone went quiet once again like so many other days where I shut the alarm and continue my sleep for few more minutes. The very nature of a human being is to prolong the sleep as long as possible. People say sleep rests body and mind for some. For me it serves other purposes like hiding from my inner voice, getting over a bad day at office or most importantly getting over silly potshots by people on my age and being unmarried as yet. While mind does recognize the nasty intentions behind such potshots of pulling one down for no good reason, I am not the toughest people going around. Its 6:25 am. Another blare. "Ok alarm-dude, I will get up now and shut you up." I get up, remove the phone from the charger and shut the alarm by tapping on the touch screen of the mobile.
So after a bit of meditation and attending to usual morning chores, I open my laptop to see if this girl Pooja Goyal had cared to reply to my email last night. The inner voice is also up by now though it is little late today than usual because today is Saturday. "Dude... she did not reply to your nicer email nor did she bother to pick up your phone call. What more indications you need that she is not interested?", comes another of its negative jibes. "Well she replied and I did not see her email in time because you were giving me shit last night!!!", I fight back. The internet is working so I am able to get through to gmail.com. She replied saying sorry that she missed the call and that Saturday morning was good with her for a video chat. Video chat is important so that you can see other person live and to see if there is something untoward with respect to looks. Frankly speaking, I do not advocate it much as it does not serve any useful purpose. You could possibly see the face but the entire body language of the person is now where to be seen on a video call. So I am going to get ready to go to office to have a video chat with Pooja. "Dude, don't...don't go to office now..... You do not understand the subtle meaning of postponing the video to chat to today morning. Why are you so dumb in reading people, dude? Go to gym. Revise the exercises learnt over the week from your trainer. Maybe you will end up dating a hotter American chick. This parade week-in week-out is not getting you anywhere", my inner voice is certainly materialistic every time it speaks and this time it was even sounding logical. "I need to go otherwise Papa will give me another dressing down. You do not get to listen to any of his scoldings anyways. So shut-up!!! I will go to the gym after my video chat with her. I will keep it short. I anyways have slim hopes as she way too much out my class. The gym is open till 12:00 pm so I should be able to practice all that was taught this week.", as my Papa-fearing rational side tries to conjure up a counter argument.
So I shave-up and have a nice hot bath. Shaving and bathing are a bare minimum I do in order to present myself in front of a girl over video calls. It's been six months since I have had a hair cut so I oil and set my hair right. "They will anyways curl around and helter-skelter after they dry up.", quips the inner voice. "Yes, they do because you speak too much", I blare out. I do not eat anything as I need to go to the gym afterwards. I adorn a black t-shirt and blue jeans as with black t-shirt you do not need to iron out the wrinkles. I pack a bag of gym clothes and my office laptop and rush to catch the 7:50 am train.
I reach my office around 8:10 am and send another email to her to check if she is available for a video call. By 8:30 am there is no response. "God, why are arrange marriages so difficult to make happen. For this Saturday morning You wrote nothing better in my destiny than to wait for a girl who I do not know is interested in me at all!!! I will give her one last call to check if she is available. If she does not respond, then I will...", I choke up because of my thirst and hunger. So I call her. I am able to get through to her this time. "Yes, please give a few minutes. Will you be able to wait till 9:30 pm IST?", Pooja asks over the phone. "Yes, should be okay. Its Saturday morning so I have all the time in this world", I manage to come up with a rational statement which conveys that I am feeling okay.
"Dude, go have some coffee before you say something nasty to her over the video call and scare her off.", comes another of the more helpful suggestions of the inner voice. However, rude the inner voice may sound like, it guides me well when I am at some critical juncture. I brew fresh coffee in my office's break room and get back in the conference room in about 10 minutes with fresh coffee. I check the topcoder website for some interesting algorithm problems. I do not want to think about the video call. I just want to be done with it and move on with my life. She will probably reject me after seeing me on Google+ or I will find something odd with her behavior. I eventually doze of after having coffee and thinking about the solutions for the problems on Topcoder's website.
I wake up around 9:05 am. She has sent another email asking if I am online. I ping her over google chat and she responds with an acknowledgement to start the google chat. So here I am video chatting with Pooja Goyal under the influence of coffee which is ineffective, after messing up my brain with few algorithm problems and under the worry that I will miss my gym session today because of the video call.
"Hi Gautum", says Pooja after seeing me over the google+ hangout. "Hi Pooja", I return the favor. Then there is a eerie silence for about a minute. I am trying to think what to say while she is staring intently at me over the hangout. "Will you break the ice by asking me something?", Pooja asks a question in her trademark assertive manner. "Dude is there some cold war going on between two of you? Marriage is supposed to be a warm and sacred bond", remarks the inner voice. "Ask something before she doubts your Delhi ethnicity. Well, of course you are not from Delhi. You were born in Laljang, RaeBareli. Seriously, what did you do to get delivered in Laljang!!!", urges on my inner voice. "Wha...What is your job profile? What is that you actually do in management at Timesgroup?", I managed to ask her something after all. So she tells me about she does at her company and we get talking over video chat. For the first time, I sort of realized that there is professional life outside computers and software engineering. "I think she is the first management degree holder that we are speaking with", my inner voice adds 'we' to the conversation. "Back-off dude!!! You slip watching a beautiful girl live every time. It was, is and will be always only be me and not us. You can look and appreciate but who ever will be my wife will only belong to me.", I banter across to my inner self as I sense that it is showing significant interest in Pooja.
"So what are my opportunities in USA? My background is in management and yours is purely technical. If you were in any other city in India then I need not worry about my job situation. But with US it is different", asks Pooja. Well her question is valid. If I were asked to move to India after marriage I would have the same questions not that the two situations are the same. "I cannot tell you anything about the management jobs in Silicon Valley because of my technical background but with your qualification we should be able to find a job here. Once we reach to a conclusion that we should get hitched, then I can work towards finding the appropriate job for you...", I reply with the intent of telling her the truth and how I will help her in case we get hitched. "Seriously, what else we can say at this stage?", adds the inner voice with still the wicked 'we' in his voice.
Meanwhile, I see a certain gloss on her face. Is it too hot at her place so she is sweating or has she put on some moisturizer? Ma told it was very hot in Delhi during this week in the month of June. But Pooja wasn't wiping any sweat from her face. "Everyone has an A/C now-a-days in Delhi, so she is definitely not sweating. Does she have a oily skin?", observes my inner voice. Its 9:20 am. I am looking at the wall clock in the conference room to keep tab on the time.
I again forgot my famous matrimonial questionnaire at home so I am not asking many questions to Pooja. By now I have grown tired asking those questions to girls in India anyways. Same questions same answers underneath. But what use has the questionnaire served anyways. I was still not able to judge the girls properly enough and may have ruined my chances with many other by asking complicated questions which do not matter in such early phases of tele-marital-proposing. Do such questions matter in life as well? How much of the idealistic answers that I expect from the girls do I follow in my life on daily basis? Barely any. Meanwhile, we talk once more regarding our families and their respective backgrounds. My voice is sometime not audible to her so she tells me adjust the mic in my headphone. But even that does not help. So I droop a little so as to get near the microphone of my office laptop. I am near the laptop camera."Dude, you have a big face. If none of your manners scare her off that big face of yours will definitely scare her. Oh look at those pimples!!! Are you still sixteen or what? Oh!! those are the raw almonds you had last night on your face.", quips the inner voice. "If she knew what you think of girls and women, she will never ever interview a Gupta sur-named person any more for her matrimonial alliances.", I fire back at my inner voice.
"So what are your plans for today?", Pooja asks. "I will go to the gym after my video call with you and then do some office work that is pending. Maybe, if I am lucky and my younger brother has time, I will head to Berkely to meet him tomorrow", I tell her the truth about my boring lifestyle. "You workout regularly?" , she asks back. "Yes, about three to four days a week", I tell her. "That should impress her. No girl till now has shown interest in your workout regime.", remarks the inner voice. "What do you normally do in gym?", she inquires back. "Cardiovascular exercises followed by weight training. Now-a-days, I am attending circuit style training under a trainer with my friend", as I give details of my schedule at gym. I tell Pooja more about my gym classes and how they are different from routine gym workout regimes. I tell her that they are petty tiring and exhausting and that I need to practice them over the weekend. "Sahi hai, tum to gym freak ho yaar", she concludes. "What was that? Was it a complement or a outright rejection that you are like any other brainless folks who are classified as 'gym freaks'", remarks the inner voice.
So while chit-chatting with Pooja and my inner voice, its getting closer to 10:00 am. I tell Pooja that I need to head to gym otherwise I will miss my self session today. "It was nice speaking to you, Pooja", as I try to bid her farewell, maybe for last time. "Same here", replies Pooja. We say bye and the video chat is finally over.
While walking back to the train station, to catch another train to the Cisco gym, I feel mentally and physically exhausted. I am thinking about my video chat with Pooja that if it went well, if I like the girl, what if she does not like me or what if she likes me. I am unable to decide so I leave things in hand of Almighty or destiny as they. "Why is the train late? Its Saturday. Everybody is taking it easy. Except me", I question and then self-answer my question. The morning sun feels gorgeous and bestows its beautiful warmth on my face and my hands. Is someone out there who will bestow her life for me and provide me with the warmth that all married/un-married couples feel. I look at the side of a my right palm. I still see the faint line which according to my Dadi is the line of my better half. Its faint that all but that's with most of the lines in my palm anyways. If only, those lines were stronger.
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